urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:feliciafidelity Felicia Felicia 2008-02-14T21:31:58Z urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:feliciafidelity:3166 2008-02-14T21:31:58Z 2008-02-14T21:31:58Z skys_estrelados urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:feliciafidelity:2893 2007-06-06T23:33:15Z 2007-06-06T23:33:15Z tv i have been really angry and depressed lately. i really dont know why im sick of everything. i punched the wall in my room luckily i didnt dent the wall i dont feel like dealing with that. i keep having bad thoughts though i dont know if i can keep going on. ive gained alot of weight too its rediculous. my friend is gonna give me the nutrtion diet crap she used and she lost a shit load of weight so maybe it will help. <br /><br />i have to start getting together a portfolio of all my good photos and i need to save for a new camera. i need to read the driving book to so i can know everything for the permit test. which isnt till july so i have time. <br /><br />im going to see the white stripes too. my mom is bringing me and a friend for my birthday which sucks now i have to spend time with the women i hate in the city i love. and best of all her gay ass boyfriend is coming. fagggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg.<br /><br />i still like chad but he is going out with this girl that likes to give me extremely dirty looks. i dont like her. ive kind of given up on men. but i kind of like this one kid in auto who is a freshman. but i dont know.<br /><br />i hope i can hang out with nick on friday i havent seen him for awhile he'll probably ditch me for some random girl. owell shit happens.<br /><br />im talking to jon now. good bye. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:feliciafidelity:2712 2007-03-12T02:13:50Z 2007-03-13T02:16:45Z simple plan i've been such a bitch lately. it may be the fact, that every time i like a guy and they seem to like me i get screwed over. Megan warned me so i guess i should have listened, but everything happens for a reason, its just hard to think of a good reason. i've been thinking of jared a lot lately i don't know why. Raquel tells me she sees him a lot, and that he has gotten cuter, but he was always cute to begin with. kind wish we never broke up. =/. i fucked up last year a lot. i seem to screw everything up a lot more lately though. my moms even trying to stop me from being friends with megan. haa shes funny. my moms a fucking she devil she flips out over the littlest things, she treats me like i'm five. telling me to get along with all the kids and make some new friends blah blah blah. how about i don't, i've tried to get along with kids in my school, all they do is talk shit. why waste my time. i just wish i could get away for a bit so i can clear my mind. i'm finding it harder to get out of my depression times. i just keep sleeping more and more so i don't have to deal with anything. its not very healthy thought i'm tired 24/7. The whole changing of times threw me off a bit today too, so i took an even longer nap. i honestly don't even know anymore i have so much shit on my mind i cant even write. <br /><br />i have switched shops though, i'm in offset now. its a lot better than cit, i'm happier in there. i love school during shop, i have never enjoyed going to school, well thats a lie, last year around april i did. wow what is wrong with me, i cant get over things. everytime i listen to explosions in the sky i think of him. its horrible, but i like to listen to them. <br /><br />i have become more disgusted than ever with my appearance lately, its quite horrid. number one reason i have no luck with guys. <br /><br />whatever, i suck at life. bye urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:feliciafidelity:2325 2006-12-27T03:40:16Z 2006-12-27T03:40:16Z To Do List<br /><br /> 1. Lose 50 pounds<br /> 2. Grow my hair out-LEAVE THE LENGTH BUT GETTING TOP CUT CHOPPIER<br /> 3. Get a Job-DONE<br /> 4. Get over Nick-DONEE<br /> 5. Stop being so mad<br /> 6. Stop thinking about the Seniors leaving-DONE<br /> 7. Stop being depressed<br /> 8. Make varsity for basketball-JV<br /> 9. Start doing my work<br />10. Become a vegetarian and stick to it<br />11. Get new vans, since mine have a hobo hole in them urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:feliciafidelity:2020 2006-11-20T04:51:20Z 2006-11-20T04:52:41Z death cab for cutie-photo booth To Do List<br /><br />Lose 50 pounds<br />Grow my hair out<br />Get a Job<br />Get over Nick<br />Stop being so mad<br />Stop thinking about the Seniors leaving<br />Stop being depressed<br />Make varsity for basketball<br />____________________________________<br /><br />Hey everyone haven't written a lot in here for awhile. Life is a bitch lately. I fucking hate this town, school, and people all around in general. I just hate how everyone is fake, don't be nice and then talk shit. its getting real old. i know that i'm shitty, ugly, annoying, loud, and more. i don't need you and your shitty shallow friends talking about it every 10 seconds. <br /><br />But in the end i care about the people that make me hurt so much and make me think about bad things. Thats not gonna make me do them, i wont let everyone around me cause me to go and kill my self, no matter how easy it would make everything. <br /><br />I'm getting over nick step by step, i think i'm basically there, but just thinking of him with some other girl hurts. But like i have said many times as long as he is happy i'm happy. Well i'm not happy but i want him to be so whatever. <br /><br />I'm a whore<br /><br />i have to think about my feelings towards a lot of things. like liking people just cause it seems like a possibility. Not worth it. I need to rethink a lot of things. But ill have to work on that.<br /><br />i have so much to say and i have no idea how to say it.<br /><br />i just want to get out of this house and walk, just keep walking till i find something/someone worth everything. But hey who am i kidding i cant even go down the street without getting bitched at. <br /><br />you know what sucks thinking you have feelings for someone and not really having them but you think you really do. yeah thats how i am right now. i'm creating something out of nothing. like with Jeff, why waste my time. all he cares about is the skinny anorexic hollister clones.<br /><br />soon ill be skinny though. not a hollister clone fuck that. i don't care what it takes anymore i will look how i want to. <br /><br />i wish i could just be my self around people. no matter what i'm not. not even around my best friend. its disgusting. i'm sick of it. i need help, i don't know what to do anymore. i just want to break out of this nonsense. its hard to be myself with so many people judging me every second. every dirty look, evil smile, and quite whispers, is just causing me to be the shitty person i am. your nothing special either. <br /><br />judge me all you want it only cause you to look like the disgusting fool. no i'm not saying it wont make me want to fucking punch you right in the jaw. of course it does every time. which cause me to freak out on everyone around me which is why everyone hates me. thanks a lot. <br /><br />part 1 of my rant is over for now.<br />don't like to hear my bitching<br />guess what<br />ITS ALL THE TRUTH SO SUCK IT UP AND GET USED TO IT BABE. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:feliciafidelity:1708 2006-07-01T15:27:06Z 2006-07-01T15:27:06Z The shins- kissing the lipless Felicia is single once again. Live journal bores me. Add the myspace. <br /><br /><a href="http://www.myspace.com/xunderagethinking">http://www.myspace.com/xunderagethinking</a> urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:feliciafidelity:1391 2006-06-06T16:43:18Z 2006-06-06T16:43:18Z My Boyfriend Jared posted those last 2 journals. To be retarded and im most likely gonna write in this anymore, ill check it but wont write. Its al whiney and shit over it bye urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:feliciafidelity:1064 2006-06-06T02:54:05Z 2006-06-06T02:55:38Z My name is Felicia. My shit doesn't stink. I'm better than you. I'm awesome, wicked cool, yadda yadda. You know how it is. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:feliciafidelity:923 2006-06-06T02:53:01Z 2006-06-06T02:53:01Z OMG WERE GONNA GET MARRIED AND BLAH BLAH BLAH urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:feliciafidelity:678 2006-06-06T01:01:50Z 2006-06-06T01:01:50Z Tegan and Sarah- Livingroom Ok I'm gonna screw this up so bad like I always do. It's a curse I'm telling you. Im such a fucking screw up at life. I'm supprised i haven't ran him out of my life but now. This has been on my mind all day, dam me and my thinking. I know this totaly contradicts my last entry, but it has nothing to do with him, it has to do with me. I dont want to breakup hell no biatch!! I dont even know why im saying anything im just being retarded as usual. Ughh you know what void this whole entry im just thinking to much. urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:feliciafidelity:348 2006-06-04T02:46:32Z 2006-06-04T03:34:51Z Hey<br />never really thought i would write in this. Well lets see i have a boyfriend. He is, i don't know he is just great. no its not one of those faggot little girl things like, "OMG WERE GONNA GET MARRIED AND BLAH BLAH BLAH". He figures things out about me that most people dont. Its weird, i dont knwo but he is one of a kind. Of course i have to lie my ass off cause my mo is a stupid bitch and if she found out i was dating him she would kick my ass and never let me leave the house. sadly though he is, was senior his graduation is tomorrow. i dont get to see him as much as i would like to. I did today, we had so much fun we saw the Da Vinci Code, it was a gay movie, but i was with him so whatever. Ughh i dont know i sound like a fag, I fall way to easy but this time i think its just right. my god im such a loser.